Why I hate "dudebro," "brogamer," etc.

[mjmjr25]

The only thing I am bothered by; is the people I find myself agreeing with in this thread :/

[Jmustang1968]

I dont like the term because it is dumb...People getting labels because of what games they like...If a guy plays sports games, I just think of him a sports gaming fan. Or a guy who plays CoD or Gears if a shooter fan... Gives me a pretty good mental shortcut of what they like... the brogamer term just makes me think of the niche gamers or retro gamers as being spiteful or petty and acting hipsterish...

What is the difference between calling someone a brogamer and a retrogamer? If you say the context it infers then you associate negative terms with one and not the other then that is on you. I don't think it makes anyone "worse the a bully" to say brogamer instead of saying COD fan. Just like saying Retrogamer for a Monster Party fan.

Words are just words. It is the meaning and intent behind them that gives context. Retrogamer is a descriptive term for people who mostly enjoy older games. Brogamer has a negative context meant to be derogatory. I wouldn't say the term offends me, I just think the label is kind of dumb.

[foxhound1022]

Honestly, who gives a fuck about labels? I think people just get too caught up in the implications of what a certain title might bestow upon them. I mean, in the end, these words are arbitrary, and only bother you, if you allow them to.

I'm all for the obliteration of elitism, but you have to also have the wherewithal to notice when your thoughts have a smattering of the exclusive type themselves, so that way you can remain as objective as possible. I don't know if this really makes sense to anyone else, but I'm just trying to convey my own thoughts.

In summary, fuck what people say; just do your own thing and let little insignificant stuff just roll off you.

[Ivo]

Many people care about words, and sometimes they should (and sometimes they should not).

I also dislike this type of separation into groups, it helps people forget that individuals are just that - unique individuals.

This particular one in people that prefer certain types of games is not terrible, but it still upsets me.

I find it a bit strange that people that are/were often ostracised for their tastes etc. then go around and do the same to others - I sort of feel like they should know better than that. There are some examples (sorry to get a bit charged here but):
kids that get abused grow up and become abusers.
people subjected to racism that then act racist themselves.
people subjected to homophobia that then discriminate against bi or transsexuals.

I think this kind of behaviour is actually somewhat understood by psychology as an overcompensation for what they have been through (JT, care to comment?),
but it makes me sad that it happens that way.
I'm not saying everyone is like that of course.
I would rather that people that unfortunately have been through it know what it is like and then don't do it to others. I guess it it worked like that more often, we would eventually get rid of many sorts of discrimination by now.

Diversity is generally a good thing (think about biodiversity for example).

Incidentally, the PAR highlighted this article which I thought was a very good read. It deals with self-loathing and discrimination that gamers suffer / perceive to suffer from:
http://www.quartertothree.com/fp/2012/0 ... nd-of-sky/

Ivo.

[o.pwuaioc]

So, I'm just wondering when and where this actual ostracism actually occurs? Labeling is one thing, but has anyone said, "Whoa, wait a minute, you can't do this or that, you're just a brogamer!" Or is this just others' perceiving that labels can act in this way and thus their insecurity that the labels are acting in this way. I can Sarkozy is French, but unless I'm actually discriminating against the French, labeling him such does no harm at all.

[Forlorn Drifter]

The words have stigmas with them. Right, I live in the South. Straight dab in the middle of Texas. I have a rebel flag on my wall, and some good friends that are black. Yet, I still get called racist when I try to explain who someone is, and say, "He's black, brown eyed, and he works down at the feed store." Do you see racism there? I don't. Yet, there has gotten to be a stigma around the word black.

Meh, I'm trying to make a point. Words now adays have to much taken with them. I use the word Mexican a lot, and people get offended and expect me to call them Hispanic. I don't get that. The examples off of the top of my head were from Mexico, spoke Mexican spanish, and made Mexican food at our culture day at school.

I don't get it!

[Ivo]

So, I'm just wondering when and where this actual ostracism actually occurs? Labeling is one thing, but has anyone said, "Whoa, wait a minute, you can't do this or that, you're just a brogamer!" Or is this just others' perceiving that labels can act in this way and thus their insecurity that the labels are acting in this way. I can Sarkozy is French, but unless I'm actually discriminating against the French, labeling him such does no harm at all.

Not all labels are created equal, so to speak. And it can evolve with time and common usage as well in some cases (like with the word "lame" I think).

If you say someone that is French is "a frog", or that someone that is German is "a kraut" though, would that count already for you? I think that is closer to "dudebro" and "brogamer".

If you are saying "some people play only Call of Duty" or that they are "Call of Duty gamers" and that is a fact, then there is no ostracism in my opinion. If you say they are "dudebro gamers" or "brogamers", there may not be, but probably there is.

Conversely when we use "retrogamer" (as we often do here in the forum I think), that is probably actually a positive remark. It is not simple, I guess...

Ivo.

[fvgazi]

I'm not sure if changing the label or even eliminating the term will matter. I myself don't use it, but that's because I personally don't give a hoot. I can see the point of the argument and I feel that treating everyone with respect is a noble idea, however people who feel strongly about using such a term will continue to categorize and stigmatize others for the rest of their lives.

I believe this holds true to many things. I work in the field of disabilities currently and there is a very large campaign about "erasing the R word". It might be nice to not have people feel stigmatized for being called a retard (because it's not their fault), but this is not going to change someone's attitude who already considers a "retarted" person a second class citizen. The same is holding true for bro-gamer or whatever you want to call that type of person.

If we "eliminate" the term, another one will just pop in it's place. People who feel the need to use such categories will most likely never change as people (especially being older). I could see myself making a sweeping generalization such as this when I was younger, but now having experienced many types of people and attitudes from all over, I just don't care anymore. I think it's perfectly fine to step in when you witness an abusive situation, but changing how someone prefers to think is a battle that will never be won. You don't like racists? Don't associate with them; you don't like people who use the term brogamer - don't game with them.

[Opa Opa]

The words have stigmas with them. Right, I live in the South. Straight dab in the middle of Texas. I have a rebel flag on my wall, and some good friends that are black. Yet, I still get called racist when I try to explain who someone is, and say, "He's black, brown eyed, and he works down at the feed store." Do you see racism there? I don't. Yet, there has gotten to be a stigma around the word black.

Meh, I'm trying to make a point. Words now adays have to much taken with them. I use the word Mexican a lot, and people get offended and expect me to call them Hispanic. I don't get that. The examples off of the top of my head were from Mexico, spoke Mexican spanish, and made Mexican food at our culture day at school.

I don't get it!

Texas is in the South? News to me.

And Hispanic is the correct term. Mexican is a nationality; not a race/ethnicity.
You can be white, black, purple, blue, whatever and still be a Mexican, Korean, American, anything.

[Ivo]

Good post fvgazi and I agree with you. It is not the label but the attitude behind it - remove one label and another pops-up. It is about the attitude, but it is important to highlight that there is this attitude in places where some people are not aware it is there.

I think this is the reason the OP started this thread, because he believed that some people here on our forums were using these terms and weren't really aware of what they were doing.

I think the aim of campaigns like the one you mention should focus in trying to show (some) people why and how using the word "retard" can be damaging and wrong, rather than focusing on eliminating the word / label and have it be replaced with something else. Like "special" (which I think is already starting to pick up some negative connotation, may be the next one in line).

Ivo.