Racketboy Quotes of the Year 2015

[Key-Glyph]

All right guys, here's a little thing I've been working on. I was going to wait until the end of December to unveil this, but I am sensing an immediate need for some positivity!

I've mentioned a few times that posts on the forum make me laugh far more often than I let on. I assume the same goes for other folks, too: stuff busts our gut, but since we don't have anything better to add than a laughing emoticon, we leave our mirth unvoiced.

So, for the past several months I've been stockpiling some of my favorite quotations from the boards, with the intention of surprising you all with a silly highlights-reel-esque recap at year's end. And without further ado, I will reply to this post and do so!

I invite everyone and anyone else to chime in with user quotes that gave them a chuckle or put a smile on their face.

[Key-Glyph]

NOTE: This is of course by no means an exhaustive list, but here are some of my favorite Racketboy quotations of 2015. Enjoy!

You should come over to Judaism. You get to learn all the awesome Yiddish words, every holiday except one involves a lot of food and wine, and once a year we dance around with our holy book because we're so excited we just finished it and get to start reading it again. -- Mr. Popo

Bone hates games released after Pong, so yeah. -- Xeogred

Just make a list so we can debate whether the games are classics. You don't actually have to play through any of them. -- prfsnl_gmr (explaining the Summer Games Challenge)

Jesus saves... Your game -- ninjainspandex

I actually have 10,000 terracotta video games riding massive war chariots prepared within a deep palace in the earth for the time of my death. And when I die, Shigeru Miyamoto and Richard Garriott are actually going to be thrown in when they seal my grave to serve me eternally in the afterlife as my peasant game makers and slaves. -- Ack

The other day my neighbor was looking at my car tires. He said they needed to be rotated. I told him I rotate them every time I drive dumbass what the hell. -- Exhuminator

Decided to step out of my comfort zone and play a couple of Ys games. -- BoneSnapDeez

It's Morphin'. The "g" in "-ing" was for dweebs in the 90's. -- Gunstar Green

BoF V finds the people who are worthy of its majesty. -- pierrot

The plot of the game has your character being called to a magical rupee pond, where a rupee faced guy pops up to tell you how you can go to Rupeeland by gathering rupees and throwing them into the rupee pond to build a giant tower, powered by rupees. -- alienjesus (on Freshly-Picked Tingle's Rosy Rupeeland DS)

Mario Golf = Olive Garden
Blitz = Ruby Tuesday -- BoneSnapeDeez

what is my heal spell? "Mediarahan" of course. what spell cures status effects? "penpatora" so obvious. what the hell does the item "gold pill" do? i still have no idea, but i have 10 of them just incase. -- DeadPark (on Shin Megami Tensei)

I KNOW WHAT COCAINE FEELS LIKE!!!!!!!!!!! -- BogusMeatFactory (on the announce of the Shenmue 3 Kickstarter)

If I could powder my copies of shenmue and snort them I would -- BogusMeatFactory (the continued meltdown over the Shenmue 3 Kickstarter)

Man-- I thought I loved Shenmue, but you're on another level, Meat. Ride the wave, dude. -- pierrot

so far Bogus is my favorite part of E3 -- TSTR

My current plan is to cut myself, enter the water, and then shoot sharks in the face with fireworks. -- prfsnl_gmr

Pardon me, I was busy preparing my french cuffs so we can discuss video games. -- Ack

I wake up with this cool dude name Luis, he was pretty sweet and evidently gets all the ladies. Apparently I have one of them things in my chest cavity and it's only a matter of time before I go batshit berserker mode and start calling people cabron too. He always runs away though when we could be one of the most badass duos in history. I guess he works alone. -- Blu (recapping Resident Evil V in-character as Leon S. Kennedy)

[TSTR]

Exhuminator's quote about tires is lolololololol

[nullPointer]

Great idea Key!

I wake up with this cool dude name Luis, he was pretty sweet and evidently gets all the ladies. Apparently I have one of them things in my chest cavity and it's only a matter of time before I go batshit berserker mode and start calling people cabron too. He always runs away though when we could be one of the most badass duos in history. I guess he works alone. -- Blu (recapping Resident Evil V in-character as Leon S. Kennedy)

This was pretty much the Racketboy review of the year as far as I'm concerned! I'm still ROFL, even well after the fact.

Here's one of my favorites off the top of my head (from the Haiku thread on the topic of one memorable boss fight in Castlevania):

I'm taunted by death
spinning scythes hovering there
eviscerating.

Despite being such a pleasant and positively good-natured fellow, I always suspected Bogus might be a Death Metal Zen Master, but this just proves it.

[BoneSnapDeez]

stockpiling some of my favorite quotations

This is astounding.

I laughed at one of my quotes. Is that arrogant?

Great stuff here.

[Exhuminator]

My two favorites this year would probably be:

I once said something stupid that a friend of mine thought was insightful.

Don't listen to a word Exhuminator says; he eats babies and clubs seals.

I like this thread's concept.

[prfsnl_gmr]

I laughed at one of my quotes. Is that arrogant?

Yes. I did the same thing.

This is great, Key! I will have to look for some quotes to add to this thread!

[marurun]

I laughed at one of my quotes. Is that arrogant?

I think that should be added to the list. Yeah, it belongs.

[BogusMeatFactory]

Key, as always, you are a bright ray of sunshine! I am absolutely honored that you put me in the list of some of you favorite quotes. Just wait two years from now around this time, I may have become some abstract horror consumed by the anticipation of shenmue. Seriously, shenmue gives me a horrible case of video game blue balls.

[mjmjr25]

for some odd reason