I need feedback on my reviews please.

[pankakes123]

So I've recently been doing reviews on Youtube. I try to stick to reviewing fairly modern titles, although I will review something retro every once in a while. I was wondering if you all could give me feedback on my most recent review. I get a few comments, but in general my channel doesn't have much traffic. I really love reviewing games though, and I need to know how good my reviews are now and what I could do better.

Here's my most recent review; Dirt 3:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d7Qfmxes ... plpp_video

Thanks

[cookie monster]

I just finished watching your reveiw i think it is really good.
Keep up the good work

[TEKTORO]

I watched Dirt 3 & Mari0,

I felt dirt was a nice review could of used some comparison to Forza being its a popular xbox racer.

And the mari0 was very intresting,but you seemed a bit unprepared.
Lot of potential and good work!Keep'm coming.

[pankakes123]

I watched Dirt 3 & Mari0,

I felt dirt was a nice review could of used some comparison to Forza being its a popular xbox racer.

And the mari0 was very intresting,but you seemed a bit unprepared.
Lot of potential and good work!Keep'm coming.

Thanks, I appreciate the feedback! Also the Mari0 review was part of my LIVE! series, so that was more of a first impressions and unscripted type thing.

[KDub]

The Dirt 3 review was nice but it seemed kind of empty. Some musical notes some where would help a lot.

You also said a few things but didn't back them up. For example, what did Dirt 3 improve on compared to the other racing games you mentioned?
With that don't use a number system. Since you're a video and don't have some sort of break down at the end of an article the numbers don't make sense. You said you like the game a lot but still only gave it an 8. Why? Just give in an honest suggestion of purchase or not and leave it at that.

Good well edited and narrated review though! Keep at it.

[pankakes123]

The Dirt 3 review was nice but it seemed kind of empty. Some musical notes some where would help a lot.

You also said a few things but didn't back them up. For example, what did Dirt 3 improve on compared to the other racing games you mentioned?
With that don't use a number system. Since you're a video and don't have some sort of break down at the end of an article the numbers don't make sense. You said you like the game a lot but still only gave it an 8. Why? Just give in an honest suggestion of purchase or not and leave it at that.

Good well edited and narrated review though! Keep at it.

Noted, thanks for the feedback.

I've been considering dropping the number scores for a while, and I think you just helped me make up my mind, so thanks for that as well.

[Erik_Twice]

Everytime I do this, someone gets angry but you truly seem to be looking for real feedback so, sure, why not? I find myself severaly lacking feedback sometimes so I know how it feels.

I think your tone is good. Sure, it's forced and kind of insincere sometimes but I think you will improve over time if you avoid common pitfalls and adjust your tone based on what you think fits what you are saying rather than what other people do in their video reviews. Take everything more light-heartedly, I think it will help you out.

Some short tips:

1) Make a list of weasel or overused words and try to avoid them. Same with common constructions. Stuff like "the first thing you will notice", "one of the best", "great sense of speed" limit your learning and expressiveness as well as making you just another kid wh who writes reviews instead of a certain critic.

2) Rule of thumb: The quality of your review is inversely proportional to the amount of adjectives it has. Adjectives don't explain things, they just add emotion or sum it up arguments. In your Dirt 3 review you abuse them. Sure, the game is pretty but why? How's the art direction? Why does each car feel different? Why is the AI challenging?

3) Don't tell the viewer if they should buy the game or not, the review should inform them so they can make the choice but there are many reasons why someone may or may not buy it, rent it or consider it a "must have". Take a more natural approach and just review the title, don't worry about the rest.

4) If you give out a score, explain it somewhere!

Some thoughts on specific reviews:

Kirby's Return to Dreamland:

1) Why does that game look bad? The graphics are smooth and colorful, I don't see how much technical power could have helped the game. There's an argument for saying the art direction is kind of bland, but I don't see technology limiting that.

2) Why is the game easy? Why are the boss fights easier than the levels? Explain!

3) You never comment on level design. Games like Castlevania, Megaman or Sonic are only good because they had great level design. The game is it's design, and your review doesn't explain why the game is interesting. Why should I play this? What interesting challenges does it pose?

Neo-Geo Review:

1) The joystick is digital. A digital stick has on/off positions, an analog stick (Like a flying stick or the one in the Xbox360) moves along an axis from 0% to 50% to 100%.

2) You talk a lot about the console and move it around but you never show how the games look like!

Pokemon Pikachu and similar reviews:

1) The camera must move smoothly. To do this a tripod doesn't quite work if you are going to move the camera around and you probably don't want to build a steadycam so I recommend you to get a screw to fit into your camera, tie it with some long string to a piece of metal you can step on and you got yourself an easy way to prevent shaking.

2) CUT AND EDIT. Don't try to make a 6-minute shot! All those "aaams" look terrible and can be easily cut out


Anyways, at the end of the day, you should really try to inform the viewers of what you are talking about. Don't just say if it's good or bad, explain what the game is and why it is that way.

Just my two cents.

[Crynox]

Dirt 3 is one of my favourite games, after watching your review, here's my thoughts:

I like the sound of your voice, its not irritating or grating and like somebody else said your tone and pace is fine.

Why the comparison to Kart Racers ?

I would have preferred direct comparison with its greatest competitor, Dirt 2.
I would have liked to hear what is different between these two games.

Best driving game ?

Is it ? I'm not sure you can really make that statement, (even if you had many facts to back this claim up, which you didn't).

Easily the best looking game from 2011 ?

Again, is it ? What about Forza 4 then ? I do agree that it does look very nice, but does Forza beat it, I'm not really sure.

Cars are similar shape & size ?

They simply are not.

At first, a high difficulty level ?

No it doesn't, it has many new driver aids including automatic braking ?

Your review is simple and fun, however I personally would have preferred more detail and facts about the game, the difference in play modes, types of races, car set etc. I would also expect to hear how it builds upon Dirt 2 and how it compares to other similar driving games.

Ok, that said I did like your review, my views are just my views & I have tried to be constructive. Hopefully I haven't caused any offence

[pankakes123]

Wow the last to replies really went above and beyond! Thanks a lot guys! I'm working on a script for my Sonic Generations review so I'll try and use everything you guys have shared with me.