I can see how Inazuma was pulling these forums away from the desired community for the vast majority of users, but he was actually part of what made the community so fascinating for me -- and not out of a holier-than-thou sort of morbid fascination. I was similarly disheartened to see Mozgus run out of town by a humorless mob a couple years ago. With lordofduct having split a few months back, I'm short many of the faces (or avatars, as it were) I associated with Racketboy.
They were alot like the friends I have in real life, and even though I've never gotten incredibly close to anyone on here (mainly 'cause I talk about the philosophy and politics of games here more than I do myself. S'funny, 'cause alot of the people here probably think my personality is totally analytical and humorless, which couldn't be any further from the truth in person), their personalities are what kept me coming back to this forum.
I realized pretty recently that the main thing that had kept me so serious about gaming was the remnants of a guy who'd wanted to make video games up until about 2005. A combination of having clown-ass upper mathematical skills and being disillusioned with the industry barred me from ever following through, and picking my fascination with gaming back up in 2008 produced a person who was more than excited to have a vehicle to express a passion for the potential of games through a historical lens.
But now that I'm in my Junior year at Belmont, training for a life as an English teacher (possibly a professor, and to some extent a published writer, although time will tell how much of that I'll get to be doing), I'm realizing how displaced this energy has become. I'm proud to have developed such an advanced conception of gaming history and potential (when most look to the past and see little more than fuzzy images of a few NES games, and look to the future to see higher definition head s'plosions), and this site has been integral to that development. Perhaps I'll even take the time to write a book about the medium's artistic history and potential (I'd love to think I could make a Scott McCloudian game about games, but that seems pretty far out of reach) some time in the future, but for now submerging myself further in the minutia of the subject is just restricting me from the potential of worthier investments and interests.
There are still a ton of great people here -- JT, fvgazi, Luke, lisalover, Anthony817, and Breetai are always awesome reads -- but now that the aforementioned fellas are gone, I'm just not gonna see Racketboy as Racketboy anymore. This is just a video game forum to me now -- a truly fantastic one with a wonderfully friendly and mature community, no doubt, but my need for that is kind of gone at this point. I know all I damn well need to know about the history of games, and I'm wasting energy ranting and fantasizing about the current state of them (a complete waste of breath given where I'm going and where other people are staying) when there are so many more efficient uses.
Originally this was a post in Inazuma's farewell thread because I didn't feel like making a bigger deal about this than has already been made (that is to say: mods, don't feel like Inazuma's banishment has caused this extreme of a rift in the community -- this was already coming), but I think that my low post-count over the course of three-and-a-half years should attest to the fact that this is not a stunt for the glamor of it all -- it's just that I've been here for so long that I feel like there may be people who would like to keep up with me outside of these forums, and those people wouldn't know they'd need to look for me if they didn't know I was gone. If anyone would like to keep up with me, I happily direct you to the Facebook link in my information. Just send me a message letting me know who you are so I'll know you're not a creepy stranger.
I'd like to formally thank each and every one of you who have made this such an unbelievable community, for giving me a nerdy, freaky little home away from home inside of my computer screen, and for being a powerful testament to the Internet's ability to unite people in meaningful and lasting ways.
If there are any great developments in my life which involve games, I'll definitely come back, but for now you can consider this account to be on an indefinite hiatus. And if you don't understand that reference, fvgazi can surely clue you in. Blessed be, Racketeers!
