Japanese Dining Etiquette

[Luke]

Sushi Bars, specifically.

I've looked around the Internet for rules, but I know we have some friends here who could give me first hand advice. Thanks in advance.

I'm lucky enough to live near a great sushi bar, and the itamae's are all Japanese, and don't speak English. I always purchase a carafe of sake, and know it is customary to offer the itamaes a cup of sake, which I have always done. So here goes:

Only one chef offers to "clink" the cups when offering the toast. The others highly shy away from it. I'm assuming you are not supposed to touch cups. Is this a correct assumption?

The chefs are already standing, but when accepting the drink, they seem to stand more erect, grab the cup with both hands and keep their eyes on me while drinking the sake. Should I also stand when sharing a drink?

"Kampai!" None of the sushi chefs repeat it. I thought it was the traditional toast, but as I just said, none of the itamaes have ever repeated it. Should I be using a different toast?

Besides a big old tip, how can I show my appreciation to them? In the States, I strongly believe one of the biggest compliments you can give a chef is "Just like Mom used to make". I've owned a catering company for almost a decade now (which I'll only be doing during the weekends) and can't think of a better compliment. This doesn't translate well to other cultures. What would be the best compliment for a sushi chef?

Chopsticks. Been using them since I was a kid. I know you can eat sushi with or without them, but traditionally, should I eat sushi with or without them?

Another sake question. I usually drink the sake as a palette cleanser, in between trying different sushi rolls. Is this offensive to the chef?

In short, I want to show my appreciation to the itamaes. Any tips are welcome.

[Beak]

I really have no idea, but I am excited to see. That all seems very cool. It must be fun to be part of something so cultural.

[CRTGAMER]

I love but don't know much about Sushi/Sashimi etiquette, but I do
know not to ask for ketchup, especially from the guy holding that sharp knife.

My older sister has given me a few pointers. Customary to order Tamago first, if the Egg is fresh then good indicator of quality restaurant. I love Yellowtail when it melts in your mouth though. Hands stay off the upper counter, chef's sanitary territory. Dip sushi upside down in Wasabi Soysauce to keep rice from falling. Eatting with hands a good thing. The running joke is Americans wolf down the Ginger which is the palate cleanser between each type of Sushi. I think washing down between servings with Saki okay, shows you are enjoying the dinner. Maybe the drink standing erect thing is just a sign of respect/acknowledgment as in bowing, but no need to stand yourself, just give an arigato gozaimasu" (a respectful thanks) when you offer the saki. Maybe they can't Kampai or clink cups being the server, not sure on that one. Generous tip with bill (not handed to chef) always a good gesture.

That is a great idea offering Saki, I guess another indicator of good food when itamae-san is jolly with a red face.

[Incognito D]

if it's outside Japan surely they would be used to the vast majority of their customers not knowing the correct behaviour anyway I would have thought? so I wouldn't be too uptight about knowing the ins and outs, but of course, all the more respect to you for actually taking the time to make an effort.

[Luke]

<snip> just give an arigato gozaimasu" (a respectful thanks) when you offer the saki. Maybe they can't Kampai or clink cups being the server, not sure on that one. Generous tip with bill (not handed to chef) always a good gesture.

"Arigato gozaimasu". I have to remember that, thanks. Is it pronounced "gahz-ee-mah-suh"?

I usually leave a 25% tip to my waiter, and also leave a generous tip for the itamae(s). I've been preparing sushi myself for a few years, and appreciate the attention to detail these guys show.

if it's outside Japan surely they would be used to the vast majority of their customers not knowing the correct behaviour anyway I would have thought?

I'm positive you are right, but I do try to go out of my way to appreciate and respect others cultures, regardless of where they may be from. My Pops taught me at a very early age to never leave chopsticks parallel after eating, which apparently is a sign that you didn't enjoy the meal (at least for Japanese cuisine. For all I know leaving the chop sticks crossed could be an insult in Chinese culture).

Thanks guys keep the suggestions coming.

[prfsnl_gmr]

It is pronounced "ah-ri-gah-to goh-zai-ma-su" (with the "su" at the end almost sounding like just an "s"). Japanese is a very staccato language; so, pronounce each syllable distinctly.

Also, eat the sushi with your hands; only foreigners use chopsticks (at least that is what my college Japanese language professor told me). Don't dip it in soy sauce; you should only do that for "na-mi" (the Japanese word for bad sushi). Other than that, I don't know any special etiquette for sushi restaurants.

Also, where do you go for sushi in Greenville? My brother just moved there, and I would love to give him a recommendation.

[Luke]

It is pronounced "ah-ri-gah-to goh-zai-ma-su" (with the "su" at the end almost sounding like just an "s"). Japanese is a very staccato language; so, pronounce each syllable distinctly.

Also, eat the sushi with your hands; only foreigners use chopsticks (at least that is what my college Japanese language professor told me). Don't dip it in soy sauce; you should only do that for "na-mi" (the Japanese word for bad sushi). Other than that, I don't know any special etiquette for sushi restaurants.

Also, where do you go for sushi in Greenville? My brother just moved there, and I would love to give him a recommendation.

Hey friend, thanks for the suggestions, and I never dip my sushi in Soy sauce, don't know why anyone would.

Tell your brother to try Wasabi 88, and Japan Inn, both located off of Arlington blvd.

Most be something in the water that makes us NC guys love the retro.

[pepharytheworm]

Do you think there is Japanese guy, somewhere on another forum, asking the proper American dining etiquette? Do you think a Japanese person who is eating at a burger place in Japan tries to go by american etiquette? And what would other Japanese tell him those standards would be? Not picking on this thread but it would be interesting to know.

[AmishSamurai]

Do you think there is Japanese guy, somewhere on another forum, asking the proper American dining etiquette? Do you think a Japanese person who is eating at a burger place in Japan tries to go by american etiquette? And what would other Japanese tell him those standards would be? Not picking on this thread but it would be interesting to know.

Well I'm sure that some of our stuff with the forks and knives can be kind of confusing, especially how we switch the hands when cutting and when eating (may just be an American thing), and other stuff we normally don't think about. But Burgers are rather low-maintenance.

[Luke]

Do you think there is Japanese guy, somewhere on another forum, asking the proper American dining etiquette?

Doubtful.

But if said forum exists, I bet the recommendations are:

Place napkin in lap, or keep it on the table.

You should keep your elbows off the table, although not necessary, you're in the States.

Don't speak with your mouth full. Then again, you're in the States, some won't care.

Fork goes on the left side of the plate, knife on the right (blade facing the plate).

If your waitress is a hot chick, offer her a shot of tequila and a beer, and ask her to "take 5" and to sit with you. Tell her "Don't worry, I know the manager", and ask her what time her shift ends.