College Advice?

[Forlorn Drifter]

So what's the point? All it does is make people like you, which has little use if you have other means to achieve your goals. (A relationship is no longer a goal for me. Screw that.)

[SirGawain]

The bank? Only to make deposits and withdrawals. I ranch, I do not farm. I have little need for loans and the like, and plan to never take a loan if I do not need it, which I likely won't, because I don't spend money unless I have to.

And you might be able to boost charisma every four levels, but why not just boost combat skills to force your will?

Real world example. I met my wife through her mother, who was a teller at the bank. She gave me her daughter's number and I figured, what the hell, and we hit it off. Got married a year and a half later. Just showing that some level of interaction with other human beings can be beneficial in the long run.

And if you really wanna get in a chicks pants, just use the age old technique that men everywhere have used: Lie your ass off.

[Ack]

Charisma helps with social interaction. Like on a forum.

Take here for instance: the more charismatic you are, the more likely that other members will want to talk with you, buy/sell/trade with you, give you help, offer advice, etc. The mod team tends to be more lenient with the more charismatic members in disputes, even if we try not to let it influence us too much.

[jp1]

Forlorn, dude, you really need to lighten up. People are trying to help you out, it's cool if you aren't interested, but the negative attitude thing isn't doing any good. I get that you are down on yourself, but this is precisely why you won't make any progress with your self-esteem. You have created a self fulfilling prophecy of you being ugly, non sociable, and in the end lonely.

I promise you, there is a lady out there that finds you attractive. You won't ever find her if you don't make an effort to put yourself into the world and accept kindness when it is handed to you. Compliment folks on simple things, strike up conversations about things you find interesting, even if it doesn't land 9 out of 10 times you still made 1 friend. Confidence is key when dealing with people and it goes a long way to charisma too, you will represent yourself differently and you will be perceived differently.

Chin up bud. Life is not so miserable, unless you make it that way. People here obviously continue to engage with you, you must have something going for you as far as personality, right? And BTW, tons and I mean TONS of woman suffer self esteem issues as well, they aren't all snooty and shallow (even the ones who are confident). You won't get to know them though if you don't try.

EDIT: Completely true story, it will sound like bullshit...it's true. I TOLD my wife the first night I met her that I would marry her. One year later, we were married. I treated her like a lady, showed her respect, stayed true and honest with her, and she is out of my league my friend, believe me when I tell you that. I wasn't just trying to get in her pants, I got to know her as a friend and we built a meaningful friendship that moved into a loving relationship and eventually a 15 year successful marriage. Confidence.

[Jmustang1968]

You can make excuses all day to avoid people, but it seems like you are wanting to find some companionship...which means finding places to talk to people and play to your strengths. In these kind of areas where you have some expertise, ideas, and reason for being there it would seem that it may be worth making an effort.

He always has http://www.farmersonly.com/

[dsheinem]

You can make excuses all day to avoid people, but it seems like you are wanting to find some companionship...which means finding places to talk to people and play to your strengths. In these kind of areas where you have some expertise, ideas, and reason for being there it would seem that it may be worth making an effort.

He always has http://www.farmersonly.com/

I made that joke last week

[Jmustang1968]

Heh nice, I saw Homesteading thread and hit the snooze button

[Forlorn Drifter]

You guys just don't get it.

[Jmustang1968]

You guys just don't get it.

With respect, it is usually the 18/19 yr old who doesn't get it but thinks he does. In 10-15 you will realize this.

[J T]

In response to the original post, I wanted to add my own experience, which was that I went straight out of high school and into the University of Utah. It was the first time I felt that my intelligence was really valued by my peers. I loved it for the intellectual freedom it allowed. I could study whatever I wanted to study! I even gave up a Computer Science scholarship so that I could have more freedom and eventually changed my major to Psychology a few years later. Along the way, I took basic drawing, acting, anthropology, history, physics, business management, calculus, history of jazz, film, and many other courses. For the first few years, I didn't care about a major. I might have appeared to lack direction to some, but I only cared about one thing: becoming an educated person. My major just kind of came naturally along the way.

If you value the strength of your own mind, do what I did. You'll work hard, you won't have time for girls, drugs and alcohol aren't much of an option as they only get in the way, and you'll spend a lot of money that you aren't guaranteed to get back, but you'll come out the other end more well rounded and intelligent. Undergraduate training is your time for breadth. You'll laser focus your expertise in graduate school and pine for the days when you had such freedom. Enjoy it while you can. As for the partying, staying out all night, and drinking: I did that in a year or two off between undergrad and graduate school, and that was fun too for awhile.