A preview of my Cartoon

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NathanBarnatt
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A preview of my Cartoon

Post by NathanBarnatt »

Heres a preview of the next episode of my Barricade cartoon. A lot more happens in it than that little scene. What do you think?

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Spoiler Duck
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Re: A preview of my Cartoon

Post by Spoiler Duck »

If I am to be honest, every element of it was lacklustre. Pick an element you want to focus on (writing, acting, design, animation, music) and work on building your skillset in that area. Ignore making finished product for a long time - attempting to do everything yourself will get you nowhere without proper practise in each.
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ott0bot
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Re: A preview of my Cartoon

Post by ott0bot »

i like the theme song, but i really didn't like the episode. the animation is pretty bad, which may be on purpose. the voice acting just sounds off and the chracters aren't really interesting. not sure what to think...it wasn't funny....and it wasn't clever. What are you trying to acheive with this?

sorry so critical...but thats honesty for ya.

ps I watched the adult swim pilot and thought it was a bit better.
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racketboy
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Re: A preview of my Cartoon

Post by racketboy »

For some reason, I'm not partial to stuff with poop in it...
Also, I agree that you shouldn't spread yourself too thin... focus on your best/favorite talents so you can really stand out in those areas....
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lordofduct
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Re: A preview of my Cartoon

Post by lordofduct »

I have to agree with ott0bot

I like your live action videos and it's mostly because of your character in total. You're a very visual character and you facial expressions are what really make it all work. The animation lacks a lot of it, I'm assuming the animation is going to be buffed up some (as this is a preview) but even so... animation just can't get across the human facial expressions live action can do.

Oh and no offense, but this is the first time I've seen the poop humour in your work... and it really doesn't fit you well. I remember the other day someone complimented your humour and ability to stay clean while doing it. You even admitted you don't cuss very often even in normal life. Personally I think you should really stick to that.
www.lordofduct.com - check out my blog

Space Puppy Studios - games for gamers by gamers
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Chrono
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Re: A preview of my Cartoon

Post by Chrono »

Using this as respite while all those bruises from falling down heal?
Atari ST, Atari 2600, Commodore 64, Master System, NES, Mega Drive, 32X, SNES, Amiga CD32, Atari Jaguar, Saturn, Playstation, N64, Dreamcast, Playstation 2, Gamecube, Xbox360, Wii

Gamegear, Lynx, Gameboy (100s of the bloody things), Game & Watches (coming out of my ears)
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General Chaos
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Re: A preview of my Cartoon

Post by General Chaos »

Though I’m hesitant to lend my outsiders advice to someone who is clearly more of a comedic insider, I’ll go ahead since you did ask for our comments.

I tend to agree with the others here--what makes your humor great is YOU, and I feel like this cartoon is lacking that. It might be fun to explore cartooning as a medium for sharing your humor, but it will certainly take some work, and as a novice cartoonist myself, I know that the imagery itself needs to evoke laughter. Quite frankly I just don’t think the images are that funny in this cartoon.

Let me know if you’re ever interested in connecting some of your humor with someone else’s cartooning. I’d be happy to send some drawings your way.

In fact, here's a very quick sample of one of my characters:

Image
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NathanBarnatt
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Re: A preview of my Cartoon

Post by NathanBarnatt »

I thought I'd get a response like that. The preview doesnt really show much of what the episode would be. The animation is supposed to be bad. The old episodes I did just for fun cause I thought it would be neat to make a cartoon. And I draw all the time. I got a good response from them and Nickelodeon contacted me and said they thought they were hilarious so I pitched them an idea and then it ended up going over to Adult Swim and I talked with them about it. So this new episode I swear will be funny once you see the other scenes. Well at least I think so. I appreciate your feedback. I dont really know how I would change it since I can only create what I think. But I obviously want people to enjoy it so I'll take your comments and use them as i finish it. Thanks guys.
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General Chaos
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Re: A preview of my Cartoon

Post by General Chaos »

NathanBarnatt wrote:I thought I'd get a response like that. The preview doesnt really show much of what the episode would be. The animation is supposed to be bad. The old episodes I did just for fun cause I thought it would be neat to make a cartoon. And I draw all the time. I got a good response from them and Nickelodeon contacted me and said they thought they were hilarious so I pitched them an idea and then it ended up going over to Adult Swim and I talked with them about it. So this new episode I swear will be funny once you see the other scenes. Well at least I think so. I appreciate your feedback. I dont really know how I would change it since I can only create what I think. But I obviously want people to enjoy it so I'll take your comments and use them as i finish it. Thanks guys.
That's awesome. People seem really receptive of your work, which is definitely a good thing. I hope myself nor any of the other forum community have insulted your work. I will certainly give the cartoons a chance once the final "cuts" are out.

Be sure to let us know.
Spoiler Duck
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Re: A preview of my Cartoon

Post by Spoiler Duck »

NathanBarnatt wrote:I thought I'd get a response like that. The preview doesnt really show much of what the episode would be. The animation is supposed to be bad. The old episodes I did just for fun cause I thought it would be neat to make a cartoon. And I draw all the time. I got a good response from them and Nickelodeon contacted me and said they thought they were hilarious so I pitched them an idea and then it ended up going over to Adult Swim and I talked with them about it. So this new episode I swear will be funny once you see the other scenes. Well at least I think so. I appreciate your feedback. I dont really know how I would change it since I can only create what I think. But I obviously want people to enjoy it so I'll take your comments and use them as i finish it. Thanks guys.
Then, as specific advice, don't put the stuff you just showed at the beginning. Like a writer has between one paragraph and one page to hook a reader, a show has between thirty and sixty seconds to hook a viewer, after which it'll be turned off by most watching.

Always put your strongest foot forward.
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