Random Thoughts Thread

[jinx]

tldr; Ignore the following. Just ranting about myself:
I've come to this realization before, and I'm pretty sure I even posted about it, but it was further proved tonight:

When given a goal or a task, I complete it without question. If I don't know something, I learn it. If I screw something up, I fix it. If I'm unsure about something, I ask. Learning to program with ncurses using bash/c++ in a single week, and writing a full fledged sales tracking program in 16 hours just because my manager asked if I could do something like that. That was all on my own time and I didn't give it a second thought.

When I am in charge of my own work, or make my own projects, I rarely finish them. I half-ass my way for a while and then give up. I learn absolutely nothing, and barely feel the motivation to carry on. This is my problem with my current job. There's very little structure to what I do, and I'm in charge of myself. Because of this, I skip things I don't "have" to do, and refuse to do anything I have to learn.

I'm not really sure why I'm like this, and I this is possibly the only trait I actually hate about myself. I've tried time and time again to overcome this, but I always tend to give up on that as well.

I know I bitch about myself constantly on these forums, and I thank all of you for putting up with it and giving me advice. I think I just need to rant sometimes, and quietly ranting in my journal never seems to help. Bleh...

/rant

[Xeogred]

Sounds like we'd probably relate a little. I thrive on accomplishments but find them near impossible to pick out myself (unless it's something physical, like this animation endorsement I got back years ago I finally wanted to hang up on my wall). I like encouragement, compliments, both in relationships/friends and when it comes to work. Maybe a bit of hidden (but good?) arrogance, but I know I'm awesome and like to hear good things from others... but to look myself in the mirror and say any of that to myself is one of the hardest things to do.

Easily something I still battle with and am trying to work on a lot lately. If you don't, maybe consider planners/calendars and writing things down, set goals, plans, etc. When I write things out and make lists or whatever, someone things start to get rolling. Otherwise nothing ever happens. I also used to always hate hearing things my dad would suggest or whatnot, when 99% of the time it was always "things I knew but just didn't want to hear" (maybe you need this, intentionally put yourself in these uncomfortable positions... only to realize it could be beneficial later?), I think I finally realized about some stuff lately that's some ignorance I needed to swallow and get over, and it felt pretty good. He wants the best for me and I know that, gotta slap myself in the face and wake up a little.

Not sure if any of that helps or relates. lol, seems hard to balance out the "looking out for #1" philosophy without becoming too self absorbed and stuck.

[jinx]

Yeah, we can definitely relate a little. My issues isn't that I didn't listen to others' advice, but that I couldn't listen to my own. All the advice I ever got was "Just do it", which I understand, but it's not that easy for me. I've always had a straight head on my shoulders, even when I was a kid. Knowing what I need to do and actually working myself up to do it are two completely different things.

When I was a teenager, I carried around a little notebook. I often referred to this as my "memory", and it helped me get a lot more done. Lately I've been trying the same technique, but it just doesn't work anymore. Maybe I'm not trying hard enough.

My problem is that I start these grand projects (I even plan out what I need to learn, and create a roadmap for the entire thing), but about halfway through I'll lose motivation and just give up. When I finally decide to go back to that project (months later), I've forgotten most of what I was doing and can't care enough to finish it. Disheartening and makes me want to just not bother starting any big projects anymore.

I think being out of school is a big part of it. There I was forced to excessive my brain and be in social environments (even if I didn't participate). Now I rarely take time to improve my skills and my social interaction is 0.

[SNKnicotine]

**Rant alert**

Lately I've been feeling lousy, I'm normally a "go with the flow" kind of fellow but recently life has thrown a couple of fast balls at me (not bad ones even!). I am finally able to go to school full time, quit my current job and work an (as I call it) "beater job". Ill be majoring in computer programming with a minor in cyber security. Next year I am also getting married and am currently helping my fiancée plan the wedding, and book the venue ($$$). All these changes are awesome, and anyone would kill to be in my shoes, but I 've been really stressed lately. I've told my fiancée how I feel but it doesn’t make me feel any better. I know everything is changing for the best; I just didn't it would be this fast. Well just felt i could rant to some bros.

[jinx]

**Rant alert**

Lately I've been feeling lousy, I'm normally a "go with the flow" kind of fellow but recently life has thrown a couple of fast balls at me (not bad ones even!). I am finally able to go to school full time, quit my current job and work an (as I call it) "beater job". Ill be majoring in computer programming with a minor in cyber security. Next year I am also getting married and am currently helping my fiancée plan the wedding, and book the venue ($$$). All these changes are awesome, and anyone would kill to be in my shoes, but I 've been really stressed lately. I've told my fiancée how I feel but it doesn’t make me feel any better. I know everything is changing for the best; I just didn't it would be this fast. Well just felt i could rant to some bros.

Can definitely relate, but not sure how to fix. Same thing happened to me a year ago with the whole "getting my dream job" thing. Getting paid more, starting out in my career path, having a kid. All great things. So why the hell did I feel so shitty? Still can't figure that one out, but it eventually all went away as the event actually started happening.

Now I'm back in the same boat this year.

Hope you feel better as those events start actually happening for ya.

[Luke]

Next year I am also getting married and am currently helping my fiancée plan the wedding, and book the venue ($$,$$$).

Fixed that for ya.

Hey duder, don't fret. Things change after marriage. I can't explain it and I won't try to, but your entire outlook on life changes. It's hauntingly wonderful.


Random thought: Anytime I hear the words "Grey Hair" I think of Bugs, the famous "Grey Hare". People need to start naming their sons Bugs again. What a great name.

[AppleQueso]

People need to start naming their sons Bugs again. What a great name.

I just realized that they don't show classic Looney Tunes shorts on TV anymore, do they?

[SNKnicotine]

Next year I am also getting married and am currently helping my fiancée plan the wedding, and book the venue ($$,$$$).

Fixed that for ya.

Hey duder, don't fret. Things change after marriage. I can't explain it and I won't try to, but your entire outlook on life changes. It's hauntingly wonderful.

Thanks for correcting me , and thanks for the advise and kind words Jinx and Luke

[Luke]

Doesn't Cartoon Network have a "Cartoon Classics" channel called Boomerang that still plays them?

_____________

I'm not sure if people leaving a forum is a regular thing, but it seems rather petty (I picture the member stomping up the stairs like Marsha Brady). At least Indecks and Retrodude didn't post a "I'm leaving" thread.

[BoringSupreez]

I'm not sure if people leaving a forum is a regular thing, but it seems rather petty (I picture the member stomping up the stairs like Marsha Brady). At least Indecks and Retrodude didn't post a "I'm leaving" thread.

"I'm leaving, here's why it's your fault and you guys suck. Please ask me to stay so I can turn you down."