How difficult is it to get yourself going?

[Erik_Twice]

1) Even in graduate school, when I got a 100% on an exam, my Father would always ask, "Was that the best you could do?". It was probably 25% a joke, 75% motivation.

Probably, my parents also want to motivate me but it is not working. I'm not some kind of Ender Sue who can overcome everything no matter how rigged against me.

2) I agree with you that ADD exists, it is just over diagnosed.

Yes, and it's quite annoying.

For a "wiz kid" (piss jokes excluded) it sure is surprising you don't use spell check.

Being frank, I know I spell some words wrong in English but I double-check them and I think they are fine so I leave a lot of bad spelling behind me. I'm trying to get better at it though.

BTW, Piss jokes? Tell me about them!

@lordofduct

No offense, but I don't understand you, at all. Are you saying that because something is overdiagnosed you are not going to believe me? Well, you don't have to but don't do it in such a way that it harms those who are not lying.

There's a difference between being pressured by parents and being pressured by your parents so much that you don't have any will to live anymore.

EDIT: Seen your later post, no worries, let's drop this and go play some Team Fortress

[lordofduct]

@general - let me give you a word of advise

don't let it hurt you. It's not that hard. Because you see, we all have opinions. What's that old saying, "opinions are like assholes, everyone has one."

Yeah, my opinion is a bit harsh, because I've been whipped enough times to form this opinion. We've all been, our past experiences are what form our opinions. And this very experience alters your opinion... may it be minor, may it be extreme.

Now as for my believing you, you can easily understand it.

as you stated, none of us our professionals. Nor are you. So I don't have to take you on your word and instead can base any judgement I want based on my own experiences. And this goes vice versa. Passing opinionated judgement is a norm, you can't stop me. It's on par with prejudice. We all have it, it's innate. It's if you act upon it that it becomes harmful. You might say I acted upon it, but in the same respect, I did nothing that you couldn't easily ignore or throw off as just another bigot. Because well, it's just words, and good ol' rubber and glue can come to the rescue.

Secondly I don't have to believe your "doctor". As again based on experience. I don't give any credit to doctors of the psychology world because most of the time their actions are based on theory. They are actively performing medical procedures (diagnostics, prescribing drugs, and in extreme cases some really twisted shit that some people probably wouldn't even believe, and shit I don't even believe half of it and I watched it happen to a couple of my close family and friends... but alas). And all this, what I dub 'torture', is completely based on conjecture. On a diagnosis of a disorder that can not be proved or disproved to any extent because we do not have the ability to understand the brain at that level.

The explanation of what ADD is on an anatomical level is unknown. We just assume... we assume that there is a problem in the brain.

But as you said, your parents... PARENTS... push you to this point where you feel worthless. This isn't your brain's fault. This is not anatomical. If I hit a wall with a sledge hammer hard enough, the wall falls down... is that the walls fault??? NO. That's the sledgehammers fault... the acting force which caused the destruction.

But alas your doctor diagnoses ADD. He doesn't look at the parents and say, "hey, the kids just being a kid... lay the fuck off of him. You shouldn't expect him to be validictorian of the nation!"

So my point in case... no, I don't think you have ADD. I think there is an issue. But the issue is completely external from what data I can obtain from you. Your parents expect 105% when you as any NORMAL person can only give 95%.




Oh and I don't play Team Fortress... Linux user here.


P.S. - any guys who don't remember me, please take a look at my disclaimer. I just want to make it clear, discussion for me is just that... discussion, discourse, and sometimes very emotionally charged. You can call this "trolling", I call it "observing". I enjoy information and suck up all that I can from all kinds of sources and I'll go to very large extents to suck information out of people. If you don't like I'm doing that, don't respond to me.

[elvis]

It's kind of amusing that this thread went from procrastination to ADD. From what I can tell, the two are totally unrelated (although it seems like the national passtime to blame everything on ADD these days, even if the profile doesn't fit).

Speaking as someone who is a bad procrastinator and suffers from depression (the procrastination and lack of willingness to start new projects was actually just one of the many symptoms that alerted me to it), my advice is to visit any one of the dozens of depression related websites out there. Go through their basic checklists, and see if the behaviour they document sounds like you. If it does, see your GP / family doctor, and go from there.

Oh, and avoid asking for assistance with mental health on forums. That in itself is bad for your mental health. Just look at this thread.

[jrod1986]

It's kind of amusing that this thread went from procrastination to ADD. From what I can tell, the two are totally unrelated (although it seems like the national passtime to blame everything on ADD these days, even if the profile doesn't fit).

Speaking as someone who is a bad procrastinator and suffers from depression (the procrastination and lack of willingness to start new projects was actually just one of the many symptoms that alerted me to it), my advice is to visit any one of the dozens of depression related websites out there. Go through their basic checklists, and see if the behaviour they document sounds like you. If it does, see your GP / family doctor, and go from there.

Oh, and avoid asking for assistance with mental health on forums. That in itself is bad for your mental health. Just look at this thread.

Haha, you totally can't blame me for the way this thread went; I'm just glad to have given LoD the platform needed to get this place back to normal.

Seriously though, I'm pretty sure I'm not depressed--although I agree spot-on with you that depression is a very big reason for procrastination. Either way, I wasn't necessarily looking for help here, as you said, the resulting path of this topic is reason enough not to depend on online forums to keep one's sanity. Mainly, I was looking for people to bounce ideas and suggestions of me (like yourself) and just see which ones jived with how I felt.

God bless Racketboy.

[MrPopo]

Being frank, I know I spell some words wrong in English but I double-check them and I think they are fine so I leave a lot of bad spelling behind me. I'm trying to get better at it though.

As a friendly word of advice, if you're not from a primarily english-speaking country then it helps to put your country in the location on your profile. That way we know "Oh, he's misspelling things because he's from Vietnam" or something.

[SpaceBooger]

As a teacher for 11 years I have seen hundreds of diagnosed cases of ADD, but only about 8 or so that I would consider true to the definition/diagnosis of ADD.

I am full of energy, some say hyper, and I am forgetful/easily distracted. This lead me to be diagnosed with ADHD as a kid and with Adult ADD in my late 20s... I have never been medicated, I don't believe that I have this disorder - I think its just my personality. Oh, that was the last time I went to a family doctor... it annoyed me to be labeled with something other than my name.

Like the great George Carlin said: Isn't there something wrong that the call what doctors do "practice?"

[pepharytheworm]

Opinions may be like assholes, but that doesn't mean I want to hear everybody's asshole.

Sometimes people need to know when to hold it in.

I became lazy because I lost initiative. But its not just things I don't want to do but things I enjoy doing. Being without a job has made it worse. Can I really explain the reasons, probably not.

Why do people always say "I didn't have that when I was a kid why do you need it". I guess we don't need progress we need to just stagnate. My grandparents would say why do you need a remote to change the channel. I guess their Grandparents would say, "Why do you need a car? Why's everybody in a hurry?".

Well here is my "asshole". We are a just envious that we had to live without it, if we could have had it during our own times we would have wanted it to. And yes that includes cellphones. Yeah I see kids on cellphones and I think why do they need it. I didn't need it. But the truth is if they were around like today when I was a kid I would probably want one too. I am just curious who here was watching reels instead of VHS tapes or playing an Odyssey in 88 instead of an Atari, NES, or SMS. The future generations will say why do their kids need whatever the future holds also.

[lordofduct]

Opinions may be like assholes, but that doesn't mean I want to hear everybody's asshole.

Sometimes people need to know when to hold it in.

I became lazy because I lost initiative. But its not just things I don't want to do but things I enjoy doing. Being without a job has made it worse. Can I really explain the reasons, probably not.

Why do people always say "I didn't have that when I was a kid why do you need it". I guess we don't need progress we need to just stagnate. My grandparents would say why do you need a remote to change the channel. I guess their Grandparents would say, "Why do you need a car? Why's everybody in a hurry?".

Well here is my "asshole". We are a just envious that we had to live without it, if we could have had it during our own times we would have wanted it to. And yes that includes cellphones. Yeah I see kids on cellphones and I think why do they need it. I didn't need it. But the truth is if they were around like today when I was a kid I would probably want one too. I am just curious who here was watching reels instead of VHS tapes or playing an Odyssey in 88 instead of an Atari, NES, or SMS. The future generations will say why do their kids need whatever the future holds also.

Aw, but your mixing up "need" with "want".

When I was a kid I "wanted" a gameboy. I "wanted" a compact-disc walkmen. I "wanted" a lot of things which I didn't get because I didn't need it. Pagers were the rage when I was in school... then they died off and my high school years no one really cared about cell phones or pagers (mostly because pagers were poorly supported and meant you sold drugs, and cell phones were very expensive for a kid). It was about a year or 2 after I graduated that everyone started getting them.

Anyways, in middle school a lot of kids "wanted" a pager. My sister's included. And they got them, but it wasn't like my parents went out and bought them for them, they paid for it with their own money they earned bussing tables. Because it wasn't needed... where is the need for one? Even today, where is the "need" for one.

A car has a relative necessity. When you're 16 and you have a job, and school, and dual-enrollment, and friends. And you live in a place where you can't just walk around to places. Yeah a car is some what necessary... it's a necessity you EARN. But a slight necessity in a lot of scenarios.

But a cell phone? Again, tell me the necessity for a CHILD. Not a teen, a teen might be granted certain freedoms that could inquire such a necessity. I still personally don't see it, and I won't be personally PAYING for my kid to have that... but shit I won't be paying their car insurance or car payment either. They want it, they have to earn it, that's my opinion. But yeah, if my teen wanted a cell phone, go buy one... have fun.

But a child... an 8 year old? Again, where is the necessity? Further more, where is the necessity they need to bring it to school? My school didn't allow walkmen, gameboys, etc in the door. Why do they allow these cellphones today? There's is NO necessity for them.





Also as for your statemetn "I might not want to hear everyone's asshole". True, you may not, and you know what. That's what the back button, power button, channel button, etc etc etc are for. No one is forcing you to hear their opinions.

I hate hearing the opinions of Christians who strongly believe that evolution is nonsense. It enrages me. But I don't listen to it, I know they have that opinion and I know to just avoid it. I don't go to churches or have scientific debates with Christians. The only time I do ANYTHING with relation to it is if I am FORCED to hear it. For instance when they try to pressure the inclussion of "creationism" into Science books.

[lordofduct]

Really my strong dislike for how we treat children today isn't really the stuff they have. It's the stuff we give them.

We give them everything with out really making them earn it. And it occurred when I was in high school, I'm not some old fart or anything... I'm 26... it was only yesterday for christ sake.

But I remember the kids. They had their allowances which they did WHAT for? Some of them took the garbage out once a week, or maybe they cleaned their room once a month. And they got 50 dollars a week! Did they earn that!? No... and they learned nothing either.

That 50 dollars went straight towards a bag of weed, a bottle of vodka, or some acid. Others it went to yet another pair of shoes, or a videogame, or some other nonsense they really didn't need.

You know where all these kids ended up? These kids who were given money willy nilly. They were never really repremanded. Given whatever their parents could afford give them. All this stuff with no real responsibility for it.

Well they're all drug addict pieces of shit today. Now this isn't ALWAYS the case. But a large chunk of them are. Still live with mommy at age 27. Still have their bills paid by their parents. Addicted to Roxies or Cocaine. They go out to the bar every night of the week and wonder why they can't hold a job. They sit in front of the television playing videogames while admiring the GED they have on the wall which they only earned a year ago at the age of 25.

These are the same people that try to rent a room from me, but fail to pay the cheap ass rent. They come to me, "awww, dude I'm 50 bucks short this month... can I hit you up next week." And then an hour later they go and hang out at their pot dealers house and get stoned. I wonder where that 50 dollar bag of krypto came from!?

Please...

And it ain't like I just started pissing about this as an adult. I did as a kid. My friends whined because they failed Spanish and daddy took away the keys to their Acura or whatever. I would laugh... laugh hard. I didn't get none of this shit... and I wasn't hitting these walls. I had a sense of responsibility to it all.

Yeah I LOVED to party. Party'd harder then any one would believe. I've been high on acid having sex in the middle of my front yard in a hurricane. I've woken up from a black out 150 miles from home in a cadillac with 3 flat tires driving on the beach in the keys. I don't even know who I lost my virginity too, I came out of a black out with some curly haired bitch strattling me in the dark 13 years ago.

But I got a 3.6 GPA. I did my homework, and I passed my classes. I had a job and I did my chores. I moved out at 17 and haven't looked back, haven't asked for assistance... shit I can't cause now my parents are dead. I partied... but I got my shit done first.

Not to say we should be letting our kids party as long as they take care of their shit first. But the taking care of their responsibilities! Yeah enforce that... that's important.

[fastbilly1]

Ill have you know Pephary, I have a small but growing collection of reel films. If I had the money and the connections I would expand to 16 and 35mm, but thats mainly because I want the classics... And no this has nothing to do with the topic. Granted I am also the guy with a g3 ipod with 15 gigs of radioshows on it, so we all know Im crazy.