What is your retro video game spirit animal?

[Fragems]

[Ack]

I'll bite, chief. What damnable thing am I?

[ElkinFencer10]

Pray tell, divine my destined avatar, soothsayer.

[jmbarnes101]

Mine too please wise exalted one.

[prfsnl_gmr]

Oh, great oracle, I too shall heed thy words!

[Gunstar Green]

How can I resist?

[J T]

If I was going to choose a retro video game animal for myself, I would have chose:

http://ghostsngoblins.wikia.com/wiki/Firebrand

Whoa. I actually considered that character. No joke.

[J T]

I'll bite, chief. What damnable thing am I?

Ack, to better understand you required going outside of conventional methods. Dhalsim and I went on a trip to the desert. We walked under the scorching sun for hours and Dhalsim would not tell me where we going. With nothing but flat dusty ground and sage in all directions, it seemed as though we could only go deeper into nowhere, but Dhalsim appeared to move with distinct purpose, not speaking a word, until we arrived at a lone cactus on the desert plain. At the base of the cactus was a nest of scorpions. Before I could even tell what was happening Dhalsim had quickly snapped up one of the scorpions and squeezed its tail to extract a yellowish brown venom, then smeared that venom on my teeth with his long index finger, and began chanting "yoga yoga yogaa yogaaaa". My eyes rolled back in my head, I began to hear colors, and I was somehow looking at myself from outside myself. I am not sure if it was the chemicals in my body or not, but I swear I saw Dhalsim floating off the ground in the lotus position for like 20 minutes. What I am sure of though, after this bizarre spiritual experience, is that your retro game spirit animal is ZORK.



Ack, you are a great man of words, able to parse text like few others of your generation can. Some may consider you cryptic and archaic, but for those willing to patiently attend to your verbose meanderings, they are in for a treat of unprecedented humor and wit. You have an intellectual depth as vast and winding as the great underground empire. There is a reason we are still talking about Zork in an age of 3D HD OMG graphics. In a word, you and Zork are 'classic'. You have a great respect for history and can trace our nation's lineage back to the times when the 12 flatheads ruled. You are also the proud keeper of antiquities, such as your family's elvish sword.

Dhalsim and I are both vegetarian, and therefore both disturbed by your gru-like desire to eat one of every species, but Dhalsim urges me to maintain a non-judgmental state of mind. You have an adventurer's spirit and are willing to boldly explore the darkest dungeons that reside within yourself, and within all of humanity really. Do be careful though, and make sure you carry a brass lantern so that you are not swallowed in the darkness. Your labyrinthine catacombs of knowledge and interests can also lead you to lose direction. Check your compass, make a map, and don't get lost in life, or you may have to spend your life working some soulless desk job at FrobozzCo International just to get by.

[J T]

Pray tell, divine my destined avatar, soothsayer.

ElkinFencer10, your retro game spirit animal is: Mike Haggar



The hero of Final Fight, Mike Haggar, is more than just a pretty moustache. Elkin and Haggar are both trying to make the world a better place. Elkin is doing this by teaching under-privileged youth, whereas Haggar is running for Mayor of Metro City to clean up the streets, but they both have the same problem: snotty gangster punks that don't respect their authority and get in the way of their goals. Haggar actually is a teacher as well, since in Street Fighter lore he taught Zangief the spinning clothesline maneuver.

You both have been known to make some questionable life choices at times though, like eating roasted chicken you punched out of a dumpster, but things usually work out for you in the end and your life meter increases. You also have a great sense of humor about yourself, much as how Haggar was willing to parody Final Fight in Mighty Final Fight (but nobody laugh to hard, or its flying pile driver time).

[Exhuminator]

This thread is amazing.