Girlfriend left me for my best friend after four years

[fox099]

Hey everyone,

I havent been on the forums for over a month now, and just thought I would check in. My girlfriend left me two weeks ago for my best friend Mike. This was after we had a fight two weeks before that where she kissed him at a party and we took some time apart to figure out what we wanted and where we are going. Well, it didnt work, and after four years of a healthy, stable relationship she left me for him. Ive been trying to get back into my groove and start a normal lifestyle again, but things that used to bring me happiness, such as video games, going out, etc, just dont do it anymore. I am sure others out there have gone through this sort of thing before, but does anyone have any input? It is easy some days, but others it is really really hard...

[s1mplehumar]

You and the majority of this forum would likely disagree and that's fine, but.....

Matthew 11:28
Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.

[BigTinz]

You and the majority of this forum would likely disagree and that's fine, but.....

Matthew 11:28
Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.

His gf just left him....he isn't going to be coming unto anyone.


Fox. Exercise and watch lots of porn. Within 2-4 months you should be good to go. Do you have local friends? Are you of legal drinking age?

[Devezu]

You and the majority of this forum would likely disagree and that's fine, but.....

Matthew 11:28
Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.

No problem. I concur. Just pray about it. Like Abraham, pray about it so that the right woman comes your way (because in the case of Abraham, it was for his son).

[Devezu]

You and the majority of this forum would likely disagree and that's fine, but.....

Matthew 11:28
Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.

His gf just left him....he isn't going to be coming unto anyone.


Fox. Exercise and watch lots of porn. Within 2-4 months you should be good to go. Do you have local friends? Are you of legal drinking age?

Do not do this - this is what sends you down a hill of disappointment, not to mention hurt - not only towards yourself, but others. And plus, that's boring. Got anything better to do?

[fastbilly1]

Fair warning to all - If this becomes a religious debate it gets locked.

fox099 you have my condolences.

[General Chaos]

Oh now this thread has potential...

[Quiet Flight]

I got dumped after a 5 year one in Oct. The gym really does help, anything positive or improving yourself helps. The spite is a good motivator lol. Also go out and have fun and start banging the first chance you get even if your not ready. Its not a relationship, its just sex and your gonna need some fun.

[equalsign]

When my girlfriend of two years and fiance left me for a teacher one night I found happiness in learning how to cook better, investing in a new wardrobe and dressing better, and reconnecting with old friends. I also moved away from and avoided any potential romantic partners and girls who interested me in that sense to avoid a knee-jerk relationship. After two years I was having a bit of an identity crisis and wanted to rediscover myself before a did anything else.

That really sucks though and I hope you're able recover quickly.

[lordofduct]

1) don't hold a grudge against your friend and her. They did what was in their hearts and you should be atleast understanding of that (you don't have to approve of it or be happy for them, but just understand it...). There obviously was something going south in the relationship if it came to such a scenario.

Yeah that sucks, but what is usually the case usually sucks.

2) Don't lock yourself into a cage. Some say party, fuck, drink, etc etc... you don't have to do those specifics. But you should atleast go OUT. You don't have to be on the hunt for a new lady, even if it's just for sex, that just perpetuates things. Just go out and mingle with people, if you meet someone and sparks fly, then yey... but that wasn't the point.

All sitting at home is going to get you doing is thinking about what you had and not what you can have. So get out the door, even if its just for walks in the park or to the grocer.

3) Don't do coke, worst idea ever.

4) repeat case 1... I'm serious about that one... you may already have come to terms with that, but there's lots of people (it's the norm) who hold grudges. All that comes from that is you'll dwell on it, and then the dwelling turns verbal, then the words are heard, and everybody new you meets takes you as 'the jealous ex' and tends to avoid you. Or will fake console you... which really just causes you to dwell on it more. Nothing is worst then that stranger telling you how if they were you they'd be breaking stuff or kicking ass.

Worst that would evolve into you kicking ass, and you certainly don't want that. And don't say 'that would never happen with me.' Yeah it won't if you don't dwell on it, but if you do... you can be surprised.


5) Lastly, this isn't the first time, and this isn't the last time this will ever happen. That sucks, yep, again shit sucks. That wasn't why you entered the relationship... come to terms with that if you haven't yet. Everything ends, but we put up with it for the in betweens. The in betweens rock!

I've had girlfriends leave me, I've left girlfriends. My best friend moved 1400 miles away with one of my longest relationships. I'm still friends with the both of them. Yeah I hated seeing the relationship end, but in the same respect it was best for both of us. And well hey, I had some great times with her, and now we can have great times elsewhere. And still I get to visit both of them and have great times.

That and its hilarious to get to jab my buddy and tell him that my dick was there first!