What was the last movie you've seen?

Talk about just about anything else that is non-gaming here, but keep it clean
User avatar
Ack
Moderator
Posts: 22576
Joined: Tue Mar 18, 2008 4:26 pm
Location: Atlanta, GA

Re: What was the last movie you've seen?

Post by Ack »

Image

The Professionals

Lee Marvin, Woody Strode, Robert Ryan, and Burt Lancaster are hired by Texas millionaire Ralph Bellamy to enter Mexican and take his kidnapped wife, the lovely Claudia Cardinale, back from Jack Palance, a Mexican bandit. While this is basically a wild west heist film exploring themes of love and jaded adventure seekers, the team-building aspect is taken care of within the first ten minutes of the movie. From then on it's almost pure action as four men who are the best at what they do go off to face a man who is also the best and find out that the situation really isn't what they were told. That's fine though, as they still do the job, even if they are having to kill their old friends.

I love where this movie sits in the pantheon of 1960s Westerns as they steadily grew more violent and exploitative, culminating in The Wild Bunch's glorious machine gun massacre in 1969. The Professionals was released in 1966, the same year as both The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly and the original Django. These films showed the dark, gritty, violent side of the American West, in which scarred men with nothing left to lose did their damndest to find something worth caring about. In The Professionals they find it in the end, but at great cost to their bodies, the deaths of former friends, and in a bloody exclamation point to a long history of violence, war, and lost innocence.

Another aspect that intrigues me is how late this movie occurs in history. The film takes place in the late 1910s, with automobiles, automatic weapons, and aging men. The age of the characters is punctuated by the technology, which also heralds the end of the Wild West. But what I really like is how these guys argue about the myth of Mexican revolution and the harsh reality, a great statement that also applies to how the Western was mythologized versus the cold truth of America's expansion. This theme is further explored in The Wild Bunch to its inevitable violent end, but here there is still just enough magic left to have a somewhat happier ending.

Image

Scream

Ah, the other Scream. I decided I would follow watching a great film with watching a truly awful one, and this 1981 slasher film really is awful. It also has a relation to The Professionals: Woody Strode stars in both, The Professionals coming at the height of his career, while Scream came at the end. But even if you are a Woody Strode fan(and I am. He has a physicality and an intensity that reminds me of Yul Brynner, and I believe he was every bit as capable of an actor but was criminally underused and relegated to B-movies), this movie is so awful that it isn't worth watching for the 4 minutes in which he appears to give what little backstory there is. Even he seems bored of it.

Basically a bunch of folks ride a river to a ghost town and spend the night, only to see their rafts destroyed and their friends picked off one by one in the night by a never shown assailant. The killer is implied to be the ghost of a long dead sea captain, but the audience never finds out, and the characters definitely never figure it out. That said, these characters probably couldn't figure out how to escape a wet paper bag if they had a buzzsaw and a guidebook on how to do it. They quarrel, they harass each other, they complain, but they don't really try to help themselves and end up effectively letting the biggest asshole run the group, and he's pretty much an idiot who is too busy giving shit to the fat, unintelligent, fearful comic relief character. They do at least attempt to put up booby traps to give away their assailant and then later bar the door, but they even manage to screw up these basics and nearly get killed off until an elderly couple shows up in a pickup truck and saves everyone after the ghost is "shot" by someone off screen.

In fact, most of this movie takes place off screen. Just about everyone dies there, the rafts are destroyed off screen, the final fight takes place off screen, and what is on screen is usually too dark to see. The audio is a mess(the soundtrack overrides all the dialogue...which mostly comes from off screen), the contrast is off, and what we can see is mostly characters sitting around arguing while the audience wonders when the next person will eventually die in one of the boring kills.

If there is anything that this movie does differently from the rest of the slasher genre, it doesn't kill women. Only one woman is chased by the mysterious assailant in the entire film, and she survives with little more than a bump on the head. It's only the men who get slashed, stabbed, cleaved, or hung. This might have made for an interesting change of pace if there was any other substance to the movie, but it just isn't there. Just like the characters in the movie, the film seems to be waiting around for something to happen. And when it does happen, there's a momentary freak out, it acts like an idiot, and then it sits back down and waits for something else.

Do you guys remember a few pages back where I said Mortuary wasn't very good? It's way better than this, and it's pretty bad. I would say Scream is probably the worst slasher I have ever seen, because it is both amateurish and completely boring.

So yeah, the other Scream is better. Way, way, way, way, way better.
Image
User avatar
MrPopo
Moderator
Posts: 24192
Joined: Tue Aug 26, 2008 1:01 pm
Location: Orange County, CA

Re: What was the last movie you've seen?

Post by MrPopo »

Has anyone seen the Yul Brynner anti-smoking PSA where he speaks to us from beyond the grave?
Blizzard Entertainment Software Developer - All comments and views are my own and not representative of the company.
User avatar
samsonlonghair
Next-Gen
Posts: 5188
Joined: Tue Feb 17, 2009 2:11 pm
Location: Now: Newport News, VA. Formerly: Richmond. Before that: Near the WV/VA border

Re: What was the last movie you've seen?

Post by samsonlonghair »

SMOKING VERY BAD! Cause lung cancer, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera!
User avatar
Sload Soap
Next-Gen
Posts: 2105
Joined: Mon Aug 12, 2013 4:43 pm
Location: United Kingdom

Re: What was the last movie you've seen?

Post by Sload Soap »

I just watched The Grand Budapest Hotel and you should too. Marvelous stuff.
User avatar
Ack
Moderator
Posts: 22576
Joined: Tue Mar 18, 2008 4:26 pm
Location: Atlanta, GA

Re: What was the last movie you've seen?

Post by Ack »

MrPopo wrote:Has anyone seen the Yul Brynner anti-smoking PSA where he speaks to us from beyond the grave?
Yes, and it's depressing. Lung cancer also killed Woody Strode about a decade later.

Back on topic, something else I forgot to mention about Scream:

The music. It sounds like a 1970s porno flick. Every time the music starts playing, I expect a character to pass a window in which Ron Jeremy is laying pipe with some lady hotter than the legal system permits. Like Laura Gemser, Pam Grier, Erica Gavin hot. Dyanne Thorne hot. You get what I mean.
Image
User avatar
Ack
Moderator
Posts: 22576
Joined: Tue Mar 18, 2008 4:26 pm
Location: Atlanta, GA

Re: What was the last movie you've seen?

Post by Ack »

Image

Maniac Cop III: Badge of Silence

Badge of do what now? A better title would have been Maniac Cop III: Bride of Maniac Cop, because that's pretty much what this one is about. A homeless guy who practices voodoo brings back Officer Matt Cordell, the titular maniac cop, for...some reason. But Cordell wants a ladyfriend, so what he decides to do is get the homeless guy to resurrect Officer Katie "Maniac Kate" Sullivan to be his undead bride. After all, Kate's in a coma after shooting a criminal who was robbing a drug store and also shooting his hostage...who happened to be the criminal's girlfriend, and who happened to shoot Kate and put her into her coma. But the evil scum-sucking media(which includes ace news reporter Ted Raimi in a cameo) have decided to suppress that part of the story, so the city wants Kate to die so they can brush things under the rug instead of having actual open conversations about police brutality in New York and in American society at large.

My, now that just seems ludicrous, doesn't it?

Anyway, yes, the plot leaves open a lot of questions and does little to resolve itself. Storylines appear but don't really go anywhere. And the movie had a really troubled production, which further hurt the film: original director William Lustig only shot 51-minutes worth of footage for the film and refused to shoot any more after having a falling out with the producers, so he quit, and Joel Soisson came in and used footage from the previous Maniac Cop films to round out the movie to 85 minutes. Unfortunately this created further editing problems, but it was the only way the studio was ever going to get a salvageable film. And it goes without saying that no Maniac Cop 4 has ever appeared on the scene.

But does this movie totally suck? Well, no. Sure, it's a mess of a film, but that didn't stop Robert Davi from being a bad ass in it. He plays Detective Lieutenant Sean McKinney, back from Maniac Cop 2 and here to kick Cordell's ass...or try to, anyway. It's kind of tough to kill a seven foot tall zombie cop. And Robert Z'Dar returns with his massively imposing jawline to play as Cordell. This film also ends with the most ridiculously awesome chase sequence, mainly because Officer Cordell is ON FIRE the entire time! I don't know if Z'Dar did his own stunts, but whoever did, a standing ovation is deserved. And near the end of the scene he gets his arm torn off before his car explodes. And McKinney then uses Cordell's flaming arm TO LIGHT HIS CIGAR! Bad movie, yes, but still bad ass.

We may one day see a return to the franchise, as the Los Angeles Times claimed in 2012 that Lustig was interested in doing a remake of the first film or a prequel with Nicolas Winding Refn. Z'Dar has also expressed a desire to return to the character. Lustig directed a couple of films after this but soon got out of the hot seat entirely and now is the CEO of Blue Underground, which specializes in releasing exploitation and underground films on DVD and Blu-ray. God only knows who owns the rights to these films at this point. But I can't help it, I kind of like the Maniac Cop series.
Image
User avatar
Fragems
Next-Gen
Posts: 5429
Joined: Sun Jan 27, 2013 1:01 am
Location: Proctorville, OH

Re: What was the last movie you've seen?

Post by Fragems »

Watched the Purge and Prophecy last night.

Image

The Purge

I actually enjoyed this movie a lot more then I expected to. The bad guys were demented as hell and the whole idea of the purge in general was nuts. While everything was really damn predictable I really enjoyed the action and pacing. Plus the ending was awesome.

Prophecy

Pretty meh didn't care much for the monsters style or outfit. Some really nice filming locations that definitely could have been utilized better and everyone in the cast gave a pretty mediocre performance. On the other side of things the story while not the best seemed pretty well written without to many problems. Was kind of disappointed by the ending though seriously they should have had a flash forward scene to show a future event which got poked at repeatedly would have been the perfect punch at the ending.
User avatar
Ack
Moderator
Posts: 22576
Joined: Tue Mar 18, 2008 4:26 pm
Location: Atlanta, GA

Re: What was the last movie you've seen?

Post by Ack »

Fragems wrote:Prophecy

Pretty meh didn't care much for the monsters style or outfit. Some really nice filming locations that definitely could have been utilized better and everyone in the cast gave a pretty mediocre performance. On the other side of things the story while not the best seemed pretty well written without to many problems. Was kind of disappointed by the ending though seriously they should have had a flash forward scene to show a future event which got poked at repeatedly would have been the perfect punch at the ending.
No, no, you're doing it all wrong. You watch this movie so you can see the scene where the kid in the yellow sleeping bag gets killed. Then you rewind it and watch it again. And again. And again and again. Seriously, best part of the movie right there.
Image
User avatar
Fragems
Next-Gen
Posts: 5429
Joined: Sun Jan 27, 2013 1:01 am
Location: Proctorville, OH

Re: What was the last movie you've seen?

Post by Fragems »

Ack wrote: No, no, you're doing it all wrong. You watch this movie so you can see the scene where the kid in the yellow sleeping bag gets killed. Then you rewind it and watch it again. And again. And again and again. Seriously, best part of the movie right there.
:lol: I did watch that scene three times. Definitely the best part in the whole movie.



That mutant sure has one hell of a bitch slap :lol: .
Pulsar_t
Next-Gen
Posts: 5935
Joined: Tue Jan 01, 2008 10:38 am

Re: What was the last movie you've seen?

Post by Pulsar_t »

Image
The Long Kiss Goodnight

Awesome old-school fun, plus Geena Davis was a bad ass in this.
Thy ban hammer shalt strike Image
Post Reply